Level Up: 7 Ways To Build Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EQ), which is the ability to recognize and manage one’s own emotions while engaging effectively with the emotions of others, is increasingly acknowledged as a defining trait of effective leadership.  

Leaders with high EQ navigate interpersonal challenges more smoothly, make better decisions under pressure, and foster psychologically safe and high-performing team environments. In contrast, those lacking emotional intelligence may struggle with communication, face high turnover rates within their teams, and find it difficult to promote collaboration. 

However, many leaders, particularly those with strong technical backgrounds, struggle with crucial aspects of emotional intelligence: self-awareness, emotional regulation, empathy, and interpersonal effectiveness. Developing these skills requires intentional effort and structured practice. 

Our approach to developing emotional intelligence integrates three disciplines: traditional leadership coaching methodologies, which emphasize personalized feedback and structured reflection; social-emotional learning principles, which improve interpersonal effectiveness; and structured behavioral approaches, including techniques originally designed for autism interventions, that offer concrete methods for enhancing self-regulation and emotional awareness.  

By applying these strategies, leaders can systematically strengthen their emotional awareness, self-regulation, and social skills, transforming how they understand and manage emotions in the workplace. Here are seven strategies that help leaders develop their emotional intelligence: 

1. Build Self-Awareness Through Structured Reflection. 

Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, and it is a crucial characteristic of effective leadership. Leaders who lack self-awareness often find it difficult to recognize their emotional triggers, understand how their behavior impacts others, or see patterns in their reactions, especially in high-pressure situations. Without this essential skill, they may respond impulsively, misinterpret social cues, or inadvertently foster distrust within their teams.  

Developing self-awareness enables leaders to manage their emotions more effectively, make informed decisions, and create inclusive, psychologically safe work environments. Leadership coaching focuses on structured self-reflection, personalized feedback, and guided mentorship to enhance self-awareness in leaders.  

Implementation 

• Gather and analyze feedback. Leaders should seek 360-degree feedback on their emotional impact and leadership style to identify areas for improvement. 

• Maintain an “emotion journal.” Documenting emotional responses helps detect patterns and recognize triggers. 

• Engage in structured reflection. Setting aside time to review past interactions enables leaders to assess their responses and refine their approach for future scenarios. 

• Seek mentorship. Learning from experienced leaders provides insights into self-awareness and emotional regulation strategies. 

2. Develop Emotional Regulation Through Structured Protocols. 

Leaders with low emotional intelligence struggle to regulate their emotions, resulting in impulsive decision-making and outbursts that undermine trust and morale. Emotional regulation is crucial for maintaining composure under pressure, ensuring that leaders respond thoughtfully instead of reactively. A lack of emotional stability can create an unpredictable work environment, leading to disengagement and reduced productivity. 

Behavioral reinforcement techniques, often used in autism therapies, offer structured methods for helping individuals develop self-regulation. These include structured coping mechanisms, reinforcement schedules, and desensitization strategies that can be applied to leadership training.  

Implementation 

• Use a “pause-and-process” routine. Practicing deep breathing and cognitive reframing techniques helps leaders regulate emotional responses. 

• Prepare for challenging interactions. Developing a structured approach for high-stakes conversations ensures thoughtful and constructive responses. 

• Create response strategies for emotional triggers. Pre-planned techniques for handling difficult conversations and performance reviews help leaders maintain composure. 

3. Enhance Social Skills Through Experiential Learning. 

Social skills, such as active listening and effective communication, are essential for leadership success, enabling leaders to build trust, strengthen relationships, and foster collaborative team environments. Leaders who struggle with emotional intelligence often have difficulty interpreting nonverbal cues, encouraging constructive dialogue, and effectively navigating social dynamics. Poor social skills can result in misunderstandings, disengagement, and workplace conflict.  

Social-emotional learning (SEL) focuses on experiential learning methods, including role-playing, peer coaching, and guided feedback, to foster stronger social skills. These techniques assist leaders in improving their communication, resolving conflicts, and enhancing team cohesion.  

Implementation 

• Engage in role-playing exercises. Practicing critical conversations enhances confidence and effectiveness. 

• Use video analysis for improvement. Reviewing recorded interactions allows leaders to assess body language, tone, and engagement. 

• Focus on active listening. Summarizing and reflecting on others' statements before responding builds stronger relationships and mutual understanding. 

4. Build Emotional Literacy Through Vocabulary Development. 

Leaders with low emotional intelligence face difficulties in articulating their feelings, resulting in misunderstandings, miscommunication, and emotional suppression. This struggle to express emotions effectively can create barriers to trust, hinder collaboration, and adversely affect team morale. The ability to communicate emotions constructively nurtures trust, psychological safety, and stronger workplace relationships.  

Autism-related interventions focus on the structured development of emotional vocabulary, supporting individuals in expressing their feelings clearly. In a similar vein, leaders can gain from guided reflection, emotion-mapping exercises, and communication training to boost emotional awareness, enhance self-expression, and strengthen interpersonal connections. 

Implementation 

• Expand emotional vocabulary. Using structured frameworks, such as emotion wheels, enhances precision in describing emotions. 

• Encourage verbal expression of emotions. Leaders should practice articulating their feelings in workplace discussions. 

• Use guided reflection prompts. Daily reflection exercises help leaders refine their emotional communication. 

5. Cultivate Empathy Through Perspective-Taking. 

Empathy allows leaders to understand and appreciate the emotions and experiences of others, fostering stronger relationships, enhancing collaboration, and improving overall workplace dynamics. Leaders who lack empathy may face challenges with employee engagement and trust-building, which can lead to communication breakdowns, misaligned priorities, and decreased team morale.  

Leaders can develop deeper emotional insight by practicing active listening and considering alternative perspectives. Perspective-taking exercises, widely used in social-emotional learning frameworks, help leaders recognize diverse viewpoints, respond with greater sensitivity, and create more inclusive work environments. 

Implementation 

• Use empathy mapping techniques. Leaders can systematically consider their team members' emotions, needs, and motivations. 

• Engage in active listening exercises. Encouraging leaders to paraphrase and reflect on others' concerns fosters greater understanding. 

• Seek diverse perspectives. Encouraging open discussions broadens perspective and inclusivity. 

6. Develop Mindfulness For Emotional Balance. 

Mindfulness helps leaders enhance self-awareness, manage stress, and remain present in high-pressure situations. Without mindfulness, external pressures can easily overwhelm leaders, making it difficult to regulate emotions, maintain focus, and make sound decisions.  

Traditional coaching incorporates mindfulness training to build resilience, emotional balance, and enhanced leadership presence. Techniques like guided meditation, deep breathing exercises, and mindful reflection enable leaders to remain composed and deliberate in their actions. By promoting mindfulness, leaders can cultivate a more centered, focused, and emotionally intelligent work environment. 

Implementation 

• Incorporate mindfulness into daily routines. Practicing deep breathing or guided meditation enhances emotional control. 

• Promote intentional pauses. Leaders should assess their emotional state before making decisions. 

• Establish workplace mindfulness programs. Group meditation or mindful leadership discussions foster a culture of emotional awareness. 

7. Ensure Progress Through Goals And Accountability. 

Ensuring progress in emotional intelligence requires dedicated effort, clear goals, and accountability. Without structured measurement, leaders may fall back into dysfunctional patterns, limiting their personal and professional growth. Traditional coaching emphasizes setting measurable objectives, engaging in regular self-assessments, and leveraging peer accountability to sustain improvement.  

Leaders can benefit from goal-tracking systems, mentorship, and regular check-ins to reinforce positive changes. By integrating structured reflection and feedback mechanisms, leaders ensure long-term EQ development, fostering stronger relationships, improved decision-making, and a more emotionally intelligent workplace culture. 

Implementation 

• Set measurable EQ goals. Define specific objectives, such as improving stress management or increasing active listening. 

• Track progress through regular reviews. Conducting check-ins reinforces growth. 

• Establish peer accountability partnerships. Collaborating with mentors or coaches provides ongoing support. 

Developing emotional intelligence requires a structured and comprehensive approach integrating awareness, self-regulation, social skill development, and consistent accountability. While natural EQ abilities vary, these seven strategies provide a systematic framework for improvement that any leader can follow. 

For organizations implementing these strategies, we recommend starting with a baseline EQ assessment to identify priority areas. Next, develop a customized plan that combines multiple approaches. With consistent practice and adequate support, leaders can greatly improve their emotional intelligence, resulting in stronger team performance and more effective organizational cultures. 

About The Author 

Michael Watkins is a professor of leadership at the IMD Business School, co-founder of Genesis Advisers, and a bestselling business author of books including The Six Disciplines of Strategic Thinking and The First 90 Days.